IExamen 2

James McQuade
Dr. Juniper Ellis
Understanding Literature
IExamen 2
October 30, 2017
The Strength of Meaningful Conversation

When I first approached this assignment, I was a little nervous. I truly was unsure whether I would be able to go a whole day with all my communication being kind, useful, and true. I also expected that this would lead to some funny interactions between my friends and myself. Like many people I am naturally very sarcastic and in this manner always being “kind and truthful” didn’t seem as if it would always be possible. More difficult however was maintaining the condition of useful information. My friends and I love to joke around and often in that manner we will send each other the most random, crazy texts, memes, jokes, etc. Essentially, during the weekend other than when I was in meetings or at mass all my interactions tend to be non-useful or false simply on the basis that I am joking with my friends.
When the day finally occurred yesterday on Sunday, I started off lucky. I woke up late with no texts waiting for me (thank god!). Then I realized I had made plans to get a haircut with my friend so I simply texted him asking when he wanted to go. This interaction was plain and to the point. But, when he picked me up he asked about our formal coming up, whether I was bringing someone. Now, generally I love self- deprecating humor. Luckily, I was being conscious of the conditions of my communication. I had to restrain myself from making a joke because then it would be unkind towards myself. Instead I told him the truth which was that I was unsure and that it was complicated. This actually led to a productive conversation which expanded my own understanding of the relationship that I had with one of my friends and how I viewed that relationship moving forward. In this way, I was pleasantly surprised. By not simply deflecting the question with a joke I was able to have a real and meaningful conversation that enlightened my understanding of a different situation.
After that I mostly slept and then went to tutoring and a work meeting. Both proved pretty simple to maintain my conditions of communication as they are professional environments and generally necessitate that all communication meet these conditions anyway. Then the most trying period of the day came along. I had chimes practice at 9pm. Chimes is our all male acapella group on campus. As you could imagine, when you have a room of 12 college guys who’ve known each other for years and practice runs 3 hours there are many jokes made and some of them not the most kind. While they are not meant to actually harm, we all have “interesting” senses of humor and some of the jokes, always meant with love and kindness, I could not necessarily categorize as “kind” communication and especially not useful. As you might imagine I had to restrain myself a fair amount, especially when one of the freshman chimes walks in and boldly states, “So I broke up with my girlfriend this morning, but  I don’t think she gets it…”. The comments that came flying in after that episode were outrageous and hilarious, but unfortunately all I could say was, which would be my actual advice, she cares a lot about you so let her down easy. In the end I’ve realized, communicating under these conditions caused me to restrain myself a lot. However, it also allowed me to have really productive conversations and I really felt that I was fully representing who I am, whereas sometimes I might hide behind jokes.